Ask The Inuyasha Cast!
by oOo-Kaede Higuchi-oOo
Summary: Yes,I,Kaede Higuchi,cat demon hanyou, and commander of all the rabidkikyouhatingsuperultramutatedninjakitty Heartless,have finally managed to hunt down the Inuyasha cast and lock them up in a special box,just for you,my dear readers,so give them questions
1. And the insaneness begins!

**Ask the Inuyasha Cast!!!**

Yes, I, Kaede Higuchi, cat demon hanyou, and commander of all the

rabid-kikyou-hating-super-ultra-mutated-ninja-kitty Heartless, have finally managed to hunt down

the Inuyasha cast and lock them up in a special box, just for you, my dear readers, so bombard them with questions, whether they make sense or not. Now, please, Shippou do the disclaimer like I told you to, and I'll give you a cookie.

**Shippou:** Yay cookie! Kaede-chan does not own Inuyasha, if she did, Naraku would be gay and would wear a tutu.

**Me:** Very good, Shippou. Now, ask a question to anyone in Inuyasha, and you'll just get the truth, I took care of that...ebil smile

**Everybody:** shivers

**Me:** Now, Sesshomaru, give out the basics!

**Sessh:** I do not follow orders from half-breeds.

**Me:** Oh, really, well then, you won't mind watching 45 hours of Barney, Dora the Explorer, and Teletubbies, each, right?

**Sessh: **O.O ok, ok, I'll do it...mutters

blah blah action

'blah blah' thoughts

Ok, I'm done now, can you let me go?

**Me:** yyyyyyeeeaaahh-no you guys are not leaving until I say so.

**Everyone: **groan

**Me: **Ok, now R&R!


	2. Cofee and Gravity

**Ask the Inuyasha Cast!!!**

**Me:**-is bouncing off walls- WHEEEEEE!!!!!!(_**A/N:** I'm hyper again...blame it on Kagome she gave me the coffee. Oh, I don't own Inuyasha.)_

**Sango:** Ok, who gave her coffee?

**Kagome: **Oh, I don't know...-shifty eyes-

**Naraku:** Why am I here again?

**Me:**-bounces off Naraku- TO ANSWER RANDOM QUESTIONS!!!! WHEEEEEE!!!

**Everyone:**-sweatdrops-

**Rin: **Rin will read the first question.

**Inuyasha: **You can _read_?

**Rin:** Yes. Lord Sesshomaru taught Rin how to read.

_**My question is...why does naraku wear make-up? Is he gay? If so, then why did the creators make him fall in love with Kinky-ho?**_

-**_Shadow Sesshy_**

**Kikyou:** Who is Kinky-ho?

**Me: **YOU!!!! WHEEEEEE!!!!!-starts spinning at the speed of sound- YAY!!! I'M DEFYING GRAVITY!!!!!

**Everyone:** -sweatdrops-

**Naraku: **I'm not gay! And it's not makeup, it's natural markings.

**Inuyasha:**-rolls eyes- Feh. Yeah, right.

**Naraku:**-death glare-

**Koga: **For once I agree with you, dog-breath, I've seen him stalking Sesshomaru I the middle of the night.

**Kikyou:**-blinks- Naraku loves me???

**Naraku: **I DO NOT!!!!

**Me:**-suddenly stops spinning- I'm dizzy...-blinks-Naraku, don't deny it, you know perfectly well it's true.

**Naraku:** You're pressing your luck, half-breed wench.

**Me:** Whatever.

_**my question is...is sesshomaru gay, cause you know he wears tons of makeup...or is naraku gay?**_

_**-The Sacred Tree**_

**Naraku:** HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU I'M NOT GAY!!!!! DAMN YOU HUMAN WENCHES!!!!

**Me:** Yeah, sure, and Inuyasha knows what's the Brady Bunch.

**Inuyasha:** The what?

**Me:**-smacks her forehead-

**Sesshomaru: **I'm not gay and this is not makeup.

**Kagura: **Yeah, right.

**Inuyasha: **Agreed.

**Sesshomaru:**-growls-

**Me: **Well, that's all for today, R&R, or no new chappie and no one goes home.

**Everyone:**-gasp- REVIEW OR DIE!!!!

**Me:**-sweatdrops-


	3. ZOMFG! BABYSITTER!

**Me:** I nu owns inuyashey.

**Inuyasha:** What's up with the crappy spelling?

**Me: **Well, I'm going to a stupid 'young geniuses' convention with my parents and I'm trying to sound as retarded as possible.-grumbles- Hmph, stupid IQ test with my stupid 130 score.(**A/N:** No kidding, I did get a 130)

**Kagome: **Why don't you wanna go? It sounds like fun...

**Me:** Kags, you must really spend less time in the feudal era.

**Kagome:** -sniff- I know...

**Shippo:** But, without you as an in-betweener, well end up killing each other!

**Rin: **I agree. I don't want to die again, Lady Kaede.

**Me: **-hugs shippo and rin- Never fear, the babysitter's here!

**Miroku: **What's a babysitter?

**Kagome:** It's someone you pay to look after children.

**Sesshomaru: **_**WHAT?!**_This Sesshomaru does _**NOT**_ need to be looked after!!!

**Me:** -taking jacket- Huh? What's that mom? She's here? Great!-to inu gang- Be good to the babysitter, she's a good friend of mine, and you know what that means, right?

**All:** If we don't she'll kill us with a bazooka, gun, corksew or any other deadly weapon whatsoever.

**Me:** Good. Oh, here she is! Meet Pie. (**A/N:** Pie's description is on my profile)

**Pie:**-nods in hello-

**Me:** Well you guys, see ya!-leaves-

**Pie:** Well, we'd better start reading these letters.

**Naraku: **You don't give me orders!

**Pie: **I've got this viper here that's saying you will...

**Naraku:**-silence-

**Pie:** Much better.

**I wanted to ask what the fluffy thing on Sesshy-sama's shoulder is. Also, Naraku does wear make-up, he just doesn't want to admit, and he is gay. Oh, Sesshy-sama, you are not gay, you are very much man.(i hope) I know this...because, well...let's just say you look really hot with your shirt off!**

–**Kuro Uchiha**

**Sesshomaru: **That 'fluffy thing' as you ningen imply is a parasitic demon.

**Naraku:** This is NOT makeup and I am NOT gay!

**Pie:** Sure you're not, sure you're not...

**Naraku: **-growls-

**Pie: **Viper...

**Naraku:** -silence-

**MUWAHAHA! I have arrived with questions!! -coughs- Well.. here's the questions...**

Naraku- Did you realize in the second movie when Kaguya said "Keep your vile hands away from me..." that it sounded like you were going to rape her? Wait... you said that you hadn't seen her in a very long time... -looks over at Kagura and Kanna- Oh Kagura! Kanna! I found your Mommy!!

Sesshomaru- Do you love Kagura? -takes out dog whistle- Say yes or I'll never stop blowing this dog whistle... -covers Shippo's ears and blows on the dog whistle, not really caring about Inuyasha or Koga-

**Kagura:** Actually, he was going to

**Naraku: **Was not.

**Kagura:** Was to.

**N: **was not

**K:** was to

**N:** not

**K:** to

**N:**_not!_

**K:**_ to!_

**Pie:**-veins pop out of her head and fire background-_**ENOUGH!**_

**Naraku & Kagura**:-cower back into corner-

**Kanna:** Since Kagura is cowering in a corner, I will tell you that we don't have a mother, we're mere extensions of Naraku's body.

(Girl appears covering Shippo's ears and is about to blow a dog whistle)

**Pie: **Dammit, why me? -blows a cork into whistle- Go back where you came from so Fluff-ball can answer truthfully.

**Sesshomaru: **hmph, I could've done it myself. And no, I don't love the wind wench.

**O and also i wanna ask, Kagome, how do you feel when Koga flirts with you and Inuyasha gets jealous? And do you feel like you will EVER develop feelings 4 Koga over time? (take a look over at Inuyasha, Kagome. I bet if you sey yes he'll get jealous... lmao!)**

**xCutenessx**

**Kagome:** -blushes- well, um, well I, umm, you see, the thing is...

**Inuyasha: **hmph

**Kagome: **-bushes some more-

**Pie:** Aww...ain't that cute :3

**Love the story. -Giggles in sheer delight.-  
MY question is...  
Mating season is soon...Any takers? -Stares at InuYasha drooling.-  
Lol Well anyway keep up the story. Lovin it so far!  
Akura**

**All(including Pie, and especially Inuyasha): **...-backs away slowly from girl-

**I like this so far.Why is everyone asking if fluffy and naraku are gay? Whatever.  
My question is:Inuyasha,why won't you let go of that cold,clay pot aka kinky-ho and be happy with the warm,loving Kagome?**

**kitsunekitsune-bi**

**Sesshomaru & Naraku:** It is unknown.

**Pie: **'Cause you wear makeup and look like girls, duh!

**Sesshomaru & Naraku:** -growl-

**Pie: **Viper...

**Naraku:**-silence-

**Sesshomaru: **I'm not intimidated, venom does not affect me.

**Pie: **I also have a machine gun, y'know.

**Sesshomaru:**-silence-

**Inuyasha: **-is taken aback and blushes- I...don't have to answer that.

**Pie:** You know you can't postpone the answer for long, do you?

**Inuyasha:** -nods slowly-

**my question is  
why does miroku hit on other women when he knows the outcome?  
(personally i think she should just knee him in the balls when he cheats/gropes. i bet it would help him know his place :)**

**inu demon500**

**Miroku: **Because I need someone to bear my child, besides, one never knows...

**Sango:** About that last part, Hiraikotsu-chan and I have it handled.

**This is so funny. Please Update! My question is that doesn't Kikyo know no one likes her. O r does she like making everyone's blood boil**

**xxInuloverxx**

**Kikyo: **I- -gets mouth covered a bit too hard by Pie-

**Pie: **I'll answer that. It's both.

**Kikyo: **But-

**Pie: **Shhhhh...

**Kikyo:** Do-

**Pie:**Shhhhhh...

**Kikyo:** Oh, forget it.

**Pie:** Much better.

**Inuyasha, when will you tell Kagome you love her? I mean, every one who watches the show can see that you're totally head over heels for her! Also for Kagome: If Inuyasha is too scared of heartbreak to make the first move, why not tell him you love him? All of the fans can see that you two are meant for each other! Ask him out for a romantic ramen dinner for 2!**

**Inu-koi's Life Mate**

**Inuyasha & Kagome: **-blush- We will answer someday...

**Pie:**-sigh- when will they ever learn, those two

**I've got a question. WHEN WILL INUYASHA JUST DITCH KIKYO AND GO TO KAGOME!?! I mean, come ON! We all know you two are ment to be. Oh, and can someone also kill Kikyo while your at? Thanks!**

**Danni 34**

**Inuyasha: **I...suppose she ditched me first

**Pie: **OMG! His brain is working! (**A/N: **Pie likes Inuyasha, just not that much. -.-')

**Inuyasha:**-growls-

**Pie: **viper and machine gun...

**Inuyasha:**-silence-

**Pie: **oh, Kaede-chan and I would love to, but the pissed off 5-year-olds with plastic light sabers wouldn't have anything to hit.

**I got a question!  
how come shippo is always wineing tp get wat he wants? he is SO gay! oh and is miroku still a vigin?**

**CrimsonEyes666**

**Shippo:**-big, sad, teary, uber cute eyes- why do you hate me? Whaaa!

**Inuyasha: **about time someone realizes

**Kagome:** Inuyasha, SIT!

**Inuyasha:**-face plant-

**Pie:**-hugs Shippo- there, there -shoots Crimson-

**Miroku:** Of course I'm a virgin, then why'd I be asking all of these beautiful ladies if they'd bear my child?

**I hhave questions and a dare  
Seshy: I LOVE YOU -Gomps Seshy- Have you ever thought about killing jaken he is annoying  
Nuraku: What is up with this new look? it is freaky and it makes you look less atractive. Still love yah  
Also time for a dare Kouga I dare you to let someone tickle you.  
Bye Bye Bos  
Babygaaralover **

**Sesshomaru: **get off me you creepy wench. I can't kill Jaken because he is Rin's protector

**Pie: **And she grew up and they lived happily ever after -giggles-

**Sesshomaru: **...-twitch-

**Naraku:** I don't care about my look. It is powerful and it's all that matters.

**Pie:** figures...

**Naraku:**...wench

**Pie: **Of course he wants to be tickled! -goes to Kouga-

**Kouga: **What? WAIT! I did- NO! HAHAHA! STOP! HAHAHAHAHAHA! LEAVE!

**Pie: **-giggles-

**I have a question for Inuyasha.What do you and Kagome do off set? And Kagome may I kill Kinky-ho?**

**kanesho**

**Inuyasha: **offset?

**Kagome: **What do you mean? and by the way, Pie-san already said we can't (to self: damn, I wish we could so I could have Inuyasha all for myself)

**HI!  
I have a question for Rin-Chan!  
are you aware of the fact that Sesshomaru is an evil demon who is evil and is trying to kill his brother and steal his brothers sword and is evil and stuff?  
Kikyo: i dont hate you... well, okay i do. but i will not insult you because of that... okay maybe i will. you are a freaking MORON! you do know that kagome is your reincarnation, right? so if inuyasha is in love with her, technically he is in love with you, so why the heck do you keep trying to break them apart?  
Sesshomaru: can i pet the fluffy?  
Naraku: why are you gay?  
Ja Ne!  
P.S. Inuyasha rocks! he is the coolest hanyou/ demon/ whatever EVER!  
okay, now im done!**

**WolfChibi-Chan**

**Rin: **eh?

**Pie:** Don't listen to her Rin-chan.

**Rin: **Ok, Lady Kaede.

**Kikyo: **Because he must come with me back to hell.

**Pie:**-loses all patience- OK, DAMMIT! THAT'S IT! IT'S OFF TO THE 5-YEAR-OLDS WITH YOU!!

**Kikyo:** NO!

**Pie:**-drags her off-

**Sesshomaru:**-dryly- no

**Naraku: **I am not.

**Pie: **Yeah, suuure...Well, That's all! See ya!


	4. Insert noncreative Title here

**Pie:** -is reading a book- teeheehee Oh. Yeah, disclaimer. Kaede-chan owns nothing in this fic but me and herself.

**Kagome:** Watcha reading?

**Pie:** Romeo and Juliet. Man, I love happy endings.

**Kagome:** But, they died in the end.

**Pie:** That's my point.

**Kagome:**-backs away slowly-

(someone busts into the room S.W.A.T style)

**Me:** I'M BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCKKKKKKK!!!!!!!

**Inu**** gang:** NO!

**Me:** Excuse me? –super evil death glare 'o doom™-

**Inu**** gang:**-shuts up-

**Pie:** Girl, you gotta teach me that!

**Me:** Sorry Pie-chan, I can't, it's trademarked for me.

**Pie:**-snaps fingers in disappointment- Blast!

**Shippou** How did you do in the convention Kaede-chan?

**Me: **Well, those nerdobes saw through my stupid disguise. Damn, I hate prodigies.

**Shippou** Well, win some, lose some.

**Inuyasha** Yeah. Even a monkey could've noticed you were making a sucky stupid act.

**Kagome: **Inuyasha, SIT!**SITSITSITSITSITSITSIT**

**Inuyasha**-multiple faceplant-

**Pie:** Ouch. That'll hurt in the morning

**Inuyasha** -from the floor, slightly muffled- It hurts now…

**Pie and me:**-uncontrollable giggling-

**Sango: ** Will we start soon or what? I wanna finish watching this moving picture of speaking fish Pie-san gave me.

**Me:** Finding Nemo?

**Pie:** Finding Nemo.

-**hops**** in- Koga! -****glomps****- I like you and am prettier than Kagome! Please marry me! -****Onna****ish****weirded**** out in background-****Inuyasha****Howdy... I've always wanted to do ****this...-leans**** forward, sticks tongue out, pokes-****Shippo****-cuddles-****Kirara****-cuddles more-****Sango****You rock. ****Miroku****You're**** hot. **

**Frost Heart Alchemist**

**Koga:**-blushes- Ehhhh…I do think you're pretty, but not as pretty as my woman Kagome!

**Kagome, Pie and Me:**-sigh- When will he ever learn…

**Inuyasha** _**WTF?! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU WOMAN?!**_

**Shippo**-blushes-

**Kirara** Mew!

**Sango:**-smiles-Thank you.

**Miroku** I thank you very much.-grabs her hands- Would you bear my child?

**Sango:** _**HIRAIKOTSU!!!!!! YOU BAKA!!!**_

**Miroku**-is unconscious-

**Me: **Awww…look at her, protecting her territory…

**My question is for ****Sesshoumaru****clears**** throat)****Will you marry me? ****or**** mate me or whatever?****If you do I will tell you how to break the seal on ****tetsusaiga**** so that you can use it!**

** HYPERLINK " ****epona's**** wild daughter**

**Sesshomaru**-twitches violently-

**Pie:** I'll take that as a no.

**Seshy****:Hi****seshy**** -****Glomps**** him- ****Raku-chan****Meany!even**** though you love your new look why do people think you are still gay?****Kagome: will you ever pass your classes?****Bye ****Bye**** Boos****P.S****Pie I give a ****magicl**** feather that will make anyone ****luagh****. Use it as you wish****Babygaaralover**

**Sesshomaru**Get off me wench.

**Naraku**Even I do not know the reason.

**Pie: **coughgirlylookcough

**Naraku**-glares-

**Kagome:** I'm not sure. Between getting the Shikon no tama shards and recuperating for another search, I have little time to study. It's a good thing I get notes from Hojo-san.

**Pie:** Thank you!

**Me: **Wait a second! YOU GOT A QUESTION FROM BABYGAARALOVER-SAMA AND DIDN'T TELL ME?!?!

**Pie: **-cowers down- sorry..,

**Me:**-fiery backround and gigantonormous vein popping out of her head- WHAT KIND OF A FRIEND DO THINK YOU ARE?!-starts strangling her-YOU BETTER THINK OF SOMETHING TO MAKE IT UP!!!!

**Pie:**-thinks-_She _did _say_ _I could use it as I wish…_Here, have the feather she gave me.

**Me:**-squee- THANKS!!! You're the bestest friend in the whole wide world! –hugs Pie-

**Inuysha** What's so special about the weird wench?

**Me:** what's so special? WHAT'S SO SPECIAL? SHE'S JUST THE BEST AUTHORESS IN THE WORLD!!!!!

**Inuyasha**-backs away slowly-

**I'm back!****Naraku****: I knew it!! You were going to rape her! Bad half spider demon... thing... -whacks him with a rolled up newspaper-****Kanna****: I know you two don't have a mommy... I was just saying that ****cuz**** I was hyper... and I felt like saying it...****Sesshomaru****: You know you do... if you didn't then you would not have tried to bring her back in the ****manga****... even though it didn't work... but you still tried! (I'm not spoiling it for anyone... Everyone should know about that by now...)**

**Shoushin**

**Naraku**I was not!

**Kagura** Was to

**Naraku** was not

**Kagura** was to

**N: **not

**K: **to

**N: **not

**K: **to

**N: **_not_

**K: **_to_

**Pie: **STOP IT OR ELSE!!!

**Naraku**** and ****Kagura**-cower back into corner-

**Kanna** I understand. I live under stranger conditions in this house.

**Sesshomaru** I don't. And I only brought Rin back to test Tenseiga (sp?)

**Me: **Suuuurrreee…

**Hello... My question is... ****Inuyasha****, can you please, oh PLEASE, ****forget****Kikyo****? She is like... dead, ****ya**** know? Who like... wants to mate with a dead girl? Um... only psycho people, so I suggest you like... move on. I bet Kagome feels the same way, ****dont****ya****, Kagome?**

**0.CraziiBabii.0**

**Inuyasha**…

**Pie:** Ouch. Teh pressure…

**Me:** -pats Inu's shoulder- I feel for you man. It must be really hard for you to finally ditch the bitch. Hey, that rhymed!

**Inuyasha** Nani?

**Kagome:**-presses index fingers together- well, umm…

**Pie, Sango and me:** She does.

**Kagome:**-blushes-

**Me: **Well, it seems that's it!

(car beep from outside)

**Mom:** Kaede!!! Pie-chan's mom is here!

**Pie: **That's my signal, Ja ne guys!

**All(****except ****Naraku**** and ****Sesshomaru** Ja ne Pie-chan!

**Me:** See you at anger management class!!

**Koga:**-mutters- doesn't look like they even assist…

**Me: **I HEARD THAT BAKA! PREPARE FOR THE WRATH OF TEH FEATHER 'O HAPPINES!!!

**Koga: **_**NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!**_


	5. I'M 14 TODAY!

**Me: **-dances and jumps around-

**Inuyasha:** Why are you so happy cat wench?

**Kagome: **Either it's because it's her birthday or she had coffe again.

**Me:** A little bit of this, a little bit of that. Anywho, I'm having a super-ultra-mega-pwnsome party for my birthday, so you guys have the day off!

**Inu-gang: **YOSH!

**Me: **Whoa, wait. I meant the day off from questions, not from me. You're gonna be waiters at my party, except Shippou-chan, Rin-chan, Kanna-san, Kagome-chan, and Sango-chan. They can have fun at the party.

**Inu-gang (minus mentioned people):** Blast.

**Me:** Well, expect an update tomorrow, Ja ne!


End file.
